to the sad clown…

it’s true that people say when you travel, you meet different kinds of people. true to that, i met many different people with different personalities from my recent trip.

 

there’s this one person whom surprised me. i had not expected to see two different sides of faces that hung on the same skull which could potentially be so distinctive from one another.

 

and my god, i think i was terrified at first. the impression this person (which is a girl) gave me in a conversation was friendly, passionate and somewhat attractive. but when i paid a visit to the her blog online, i felt as if i had intruded into a totally different person’s territory. what was masked behind the somewhat extrovert character is a moody, emotional and to a large extent a very egoistic side of this pitiful individual.

 

i think what she claims in her blog that she does best is to put on different levels of intelligence and masks to suit different people she meets. let say she meets a fool, she would then speak and act very much like one (to not let the fool feel intimidated according to her blog) and should she meet an intellect, she would happily tears the masks off and enjoy the intellectual talk. this made me wonder, what kind of masks did she put on when she spoke to me??

 

yet i must admit, i was already very much drawn to her at the first place, even more after i found out the different side of her. her ability to wear different masks to suit different people she interacts with really impress me, and in truth made me feel intimidated and slightly disgusted.

 

then i began to pity her and probably she does deserve some pity. such individual may never truly seen her true self in the mirror. is she really better than the rest? is she really one of the rare intellectual, the wise among the many fool? if so, is she happy? what joy can come to a clown, who smiles and cries to satisfy the crowds?

 

i do want to try to befriend this sad yet interesting individual. but her high and sturdy egoistic wall bars herself from doing so. yet what i can do here is to just wish her all the best, that she would one day no longer need to put on masks and wear emotions that doesn’t resonate with her heart, that she would learn that even the most popular and successful clown, is the one that really needs cheering up.