“All I wanted is to hear his voice again.” Daphne covers her face with her hands as she utters her seemingly desperate remark to Jonathan who’s sitting right next to her. It is another day like usual, people flocking the streets shopping, then stopping for tea, before continuing the ongoing conquest of donating endless quids to the malls.
“You’re rather foolish, you know. So this is what you ask me out here to talk about? Just that and you’re all hyped.” Jonathan with his bemused facial expression explains it all; this is not the first time he has heard about this from his childhood friend.
“But it’s HIM…it was so long since I’ve heard from him. And I heard from him today! Of all people, of course you know how I feel? You must know.”, while saying that, she checks her phone to see if she gets any text message from him. It’s the seventh time since they sat down at the table.
“Can you stop doing that, it is irritating.” Daphne looks at Jonathan apologetically and puts away the phone. “In case you’ve forgotten, it has been MONTHS since you heard from him. And he never once called you! Why can’t you just let it go?” Jonathan looks out onto the streets. He couldn’t bear to see her getting hurt, his words is true, but also painful to her.
“He might have been busy with his studies you know, MBA, he has placements and stuffs, plus he has just moved to the city not long ago. It’s not surprising that he’ll go “missing” for a couple of months.”, Daphne presents her argument as if she’s trying to win a debate. “Yeah, right. Is it that hard to reply your texts? Or better, actually picking up your calls?”, John retorts without much thought. It starts to get onto his nerve.
Daphne just look into her cup of tea, saying nothing. Deep down she knows that Jonathan has his point. Him picking up her call right at this time means a lot to her. It’s her birthday today. She stayed up late last night as she prayed really hard for her birthday wish; to hear him wishing her happy birthday. In the end she got her wish, despite it was just a simple “hello, how are you”, she was overjoyed.
“Look, Daphne, he HAS a girlfriend right now…”. Before he could finished, Daphne cut in, saying, “But not married”. Jonathan helplessly allows her the luxury to state her point, before continuing, “…don’t you think that it’s best to just leave him as it is?”. “All I want is to be his friend, that’s just it. To listen to him sometimes and him listening to me. I’m not forcing him to be my boyfriend…of course it would be great if this happens, but I just want him to be my friend. Is that too much to ask from me?”
“Don’t you think that a girl pestering a boy all the time would be a bad option for marriage? What kind of girls actually do that?”, says Jonathan while taking another sip from his cup “. “Well why not? Why can’t girls chase boys? I know I like him enough”, Daphne exclaims as her face blushes. “Have you ever come across the thought that he might not like what you’re doing, and thus not answering your calls?” Jonathan knows that he has won the argument, for Daphne is speechless.
Looking into her determined eyes convinces Jonathan that it is futile to ask Daphne to give up on him. “You’re just pathetic, you know? Pathetic. You care so much about a boy who might not cared for you, and distancing yourself from other friends, friends who actually have your best interest at heart, friends who actually stood by you through THICK and THIN. Just a call from him made you feel like you’re on cloud nine. When was the last time you spoke to Natasha, Clover and Mandy? You’re almost a stranger to them already.”
Knowing that Jonathan is unhappy with her, Daphne look down into her hands, interlocking her fingers, reeling from guilt. Indeed, her passionate conquest for love has strained other relationships with her friends. Jonathan has a point, is he worth the trouble?
Feeling that he might have been too harsh on Daphne, Jonathan grabs her hand and bid her to look up. “Daphne, go and catch your dreams if you must. Do what you can to reach the stars. But at times, we have to wake up from dreams, we have to put our feet on the ground. Just remember that if you ever need me, I’ll always be there for you.”. At that very moment Daphne could barely hold her tears, but somehow she manage to.
Then with every single ounce of courage she mutters the words. “All I want is to just hear his voice again.”
Jonathan takes up his cup of coffee and take a sip of it. “I know” is the only reply he could think of. It’s almost the end of summer, fall is coming. As Daphne remains silent, engulfed with a thousand thoughts and emotions, time just slipped by. Summer, as Jonathan says to himself, should have lasted longer.
Brief Remark:*I have a lot in my mind lately, and instead of posting my usual genre of poetry, I thought it might be good write a short story instead. As the title suggests, this is the “Sum of Fears, Doubt and Joy”.*