Monday, 17 October 2011

Luna & Venus

He has lived to see better nights. The sky tonight is dark, and the moon, is presumably hidden by the dark nimbus clouds. What is left visible through the dark veil is only a little bright shining star, glimmering out of the abyss of darkness in the sky. Someone once told him, that star is actually Venus. It is also called the Evening Star.

He knows her long enough that there is far more graver situation that needs his immediate attention than the stars. Rushing upon the stairs, he strived towards his destination as fast as his legs could carry him, almost taking 2, even 3 steps at the time.

“Sorry, I’m late…I brought you something spe-“

Whatever excuses he thought might be sufficient, there is no helping it. There she is, resting her arms onto the railing of the overhead bridge, overlooking the busy traffic in the double lane roads beneath. Somebody once said that you can read a lot from one’s body language. She looks like she could just crumble at any second.

What’s left in her that prevents a total collapse?

Walking up next to her, he folded his arm and lean onto the railing. The cold breeze brushes gently onto his face while he admires the long, red serpent-like creature that crawls and slithers slowly beneath him. Stretching his view as far as possible towards his left without turning his head, he sees two streams of tears flowing down her cheeks. As she remains still and oblivious to his arrival, he lets out a short sigh.

For the next minute, the only thing in motion is the red dragon below them.

“Why so quiet?”

“What’s wrong with silence? Silence, at times, could be a good comforter.” 

“Well, some ladies would prefer a more ‘aggressive’ comforting than this!”

Upon finishing her sentence, she turns her head towards him, and looks intensely into his eyes. She smiles while awaiting for his reply.

Right then he feels that he would give up the whole world for another look of hers in like this. And he would not avert his eyes for anything that is less angelic than the sight that is currently beholding his eyes.

Sensing no reply, she turns 90 degrees towards him, with the left side of her body leaning on the railing. Her right hand, is placed behind her back, presumably holding onto the edge of her blouse, which is a little habit of hers.

“No wonder you’re still single to this day. When was it that you went out for a date?”

“I would like to believe that I’m still young, in my prime, and time is a precious luxury that I can still afford. You don’t get to be young forever.”

“Well, you’re NOT really young anymore…”

Replacing both her arms onto the railing again, she reverts back to the position he found her in earlier. Suddenly, she straightens  up in a jerk, turns around and points  towards him, face bewildered, trying to express some kind of epiphany that has just descent upon her.

“I know…you like GUYS!”

“Wha…”

All that follows after is her own ruckus laughing uncontrollably, with her right hand covering over her mouth.  As if a disease spreading around, he follows suit and laughs as well.

“Ah…this is so funny!”

Upon saying this she rubs her eyes. He knows, there is still sorrow hidden behind that facade. Behind every brave face, there’s always this sad clown.

“I must say, thank you very much. You are a good man, a good friend.”

Deep down his heart rejoiced and mourned this pleasant yet devastating statement.

“For? I’m not going to buy you supper.”

“We might as well go get some. And yes, you ARE going to buy me supper!”

“I thought you are supposed  to show me some gratitude?”

“Yes I am, that’s why I’m buying you alcohol while you buy me supper, deal?”

“If my memory serves me well, I bought you lunch in China Town two days ago.”

“Race you to the Gardens then. Loser pays for everything!”

Without waiting for his reply, she turns and runs down the stairs, leaving him alone behind, still leaning both arms on the railing.

He looks up to the starry sky, and realised that the full moon is now visible, no longer hidden by the dark clouds. But the Evening Star, Venus, is nowhere to be seen.

She would still need time, to mend the wounds and the pain. But she is strong. Strong enough to shine through those invisible barriers. With help of course, with sacrifice that Venus would gladly give up, for another sight, another view of the splendid, magnificent and beautiful full moon.

Could both the moon and the Evening Star co-exist in one beautiful night sky? Nobody knows. Only time would tell.

Monday, 10 October 2011

安抚与自疗

天色阴暗,乌云满天。只见约有五六颗星星逃避了乌云的遮盖,狂热的燃烧,发光。

他边跑边喘着气,爬上楼梯。

“对不起,我迟到了。但我带了…”还没说完,眼见她垂头丧气,双臂在栏杆上的捧着那憔悴的身子。天桥下的车子来来往往,一列列的红灯、金光犹如大江的急流。

看来雨过了但天未晴。

每当她在感情上、事业上、甚至家庭里碰钉子,都会一个人跑到这里。虽然如此,这可是他第一次是受约而来的。

叹了一口气,走到她右边,学她一模一样,俯身躺在栏杆上。偷偷地斜望了她一眼,只见脸颊上流着两条小溪,双眼目不转睛望着远方的乌云随风而飘。

双方都不说话,都不出声,双方都不想打破僵局。

“怎么来了,却不说话呢?”她终于开口,转向他微微苦笑。

“你约我来,难道就是要听我说话吗?”看她笑得太勉强,心里不禁难受,接着道:“安静也可以是个很好的安慰。”

“哈哈哈…女人的特权就是要男人安慰,说好听的呀!”

此刻一望她那诚恳的笑声、由心而发的笑容,顿时让他解去许多心中的不安。

见他只是望着自己微微笑,什么也不说,就道:“难怪你到现在都没女生喜欢。都那么大年纪了,女朋友一个都没。”

“这样不是很好吗?自由自在的,我行我素啊!要做什么就做什么,要去那里就去哪里,没人管我,只有我管人。”

“难道,你喜欢…”说到一半,不禁笑出声来。这时见他迷糊的样子,提起无名指指着他接着说:“你一定是喜欢男人!”说完了,又哈哈大笑。

听了这番话,顿时也不知要说什么,也就陪她一起大笑。

如果真的喜欢男人,我才不会在这陪着你了。

“啊…笑得出泪了!”此时心想,她一定又触动了那些伤心事,心中难过,不禁流泪。她右手擦一擦双眼,抹去眼泪。

“真得谢你呀。那么晚了,还约你到这样的地方消费时间,浪费光阴。”她把手搭在他肩膀上,又说:“真够朋友!”

不由自己的,他心中有如被刺一般。

“一起去吃宵夜吧!我好饿!照旧,我请喝,你请吃!”

“那么不公平!这不是占我便宜吗?”

“哪…先到的拿主意!”话还没说完,她转身就跑了。

看着她奔跑的背影,心中悲喜交加。转身又搭在栏杆上,望着依然繁忙的大道。心中有意成全她,特意怠慢,故意输给她。

他可真大方,宁可牺牲自己心深处的感觉,用来弥补她心灵的皮外伤。但真正的伤口,可得让时间慢慢医治。

此时有如海湾的新月逃出了乌云的遮盖,乌云却把那五六颗星星盖了。虽然她未能完全把心事放下,心情却是好多了。他不禁自问,这个夜晚,这个地方,这些对白,究竟是为了安抚她,还是为了自疗伤处?

Sunday, 9 October 2011

Rites of Passage

A day out in the park in such a weather is always nice, though she is very well aware that any given day could have any kind of weather, be it rain or shine, you can never tell. There is a children’s playground right next to the main path, while a football field is approximately a hundred yards away.

As she walks along the path that she had become so familiar with over the past year, it is hard for her to shut away those feelings, even in a day like this.

Regret, is what she feels. Or not, remorse might be a better word to describe her feeling. They had those moments, didn’t they? But nothing came to fruition. All the time she considers whether it would have been different if she did something different.

Yes, by many people’s standards, she is not…”conventional”. In cases like these, most of her friends would have jumped into it without a second thought. Young heads were governed by young minds of passion and instinct, as for her, rational and logic comes first.

Then as she walks past the children’s playground, she sees a boy of probably twelve or thirteen, staring rather intently towards the group of little kids enjoying themselves on the swings, sliding, shouting, cheering. She can see that the boy is struggling. But she knows that she could not help.

For wisdom comes with age. Maybe it came a little too early for her. With wisdom one begins to wield more caution and hesitancy. There was too much to consider. That is why, she often believes, things remains sparks where it should have been a disaster.

Could she ever return to the same point in the future, that she may try taking a different path? No one could tell for certain. The boy finally turn and start to walk away, seemingly decided to not join the kids at the playground. He stop right next to the football field, where a group of boys are playing 5-a-sides football.

It is not the time yet. She knows she does not fit anywhere just yet. There is a need to do a little of soul-searching, as the boy must now try to determine his own identity, rework it and build on it for the future. The regret, or remorse, would always remain, adding onto whatever amount of wisdom that is already available, to help decide what to do in the future.